Sculpting BJD Head – Part 1

I was given this pack of Das paper clay about 5 years ago and I’ve never really done anything with it other than prop my desk lol. So one day when I was bored I tinkered with it and tried to make a doll head. These pics are several weeks ago before I stuffed up my hand.

The first thing I did was used my Dollshe Saint Old Hound Body as a reference for size. I’ve stuck his torso part onto a box so I can turn it around while I work on the head because I didn’t have a lazy susan. Then I used a balsa wood stick which I wrapped with some foil to give me a ‘head start’ (still with the bad puns I’m sorry!)

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Continue reading “Sculpting BJD Head – Part 1”

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Sculpting BJD Head – Part 1

Haiiiiiiiiirr

I like this sort of haircut. My fave, actually. I don’t know, maybe because it gives off a sort of bummish kurt-cobainish vibe and it makes me feel less guilty for being such a messy messed up person.

And I realise I take a lot of photos of this particular doll from this angle, lol. I know it’s super boring but I just like the look of this head from this side, I think it looks a lot more vulnerable and lost, ha… this one’s Cameron, my very first Venitu, who is uh… a girl actually. I unfortunately haven’t been able to find any feminine clothing that would fit her size, but hopefully soon she will have a dress made especially for her, until then she will just have to put up with hmmm curious glances.

Haiiiiiiiiirr

Little steps…

Ah… What can I say. I feel like a mother whose son has just told her that he wants to live as the girl he’s always felt he was. So, here I am watching him toss out his worn out pair of work jeans. He’s stopped wearing that ridiculous baseball cap and shaken all his lovely long locks free. He…, or rather, ‘she’ is putting on her first dress–just something I used to wear, several sizes too small for her. She peeks into the mirror, half scared and so unsure of what to make of herself, saying to me with a mirthless laugh, how hideous and ridiculous she must look, while I am thinking that she’s the most beautiful and brave girl I’ve ever met. She turns a few times, scrutinising her reflection, holding her shoulders up in an effort to make herself appear smaller, less masculine. She catches me looking at her, and almost immediately her eyes cast down. “I wish I wasn’t so tall,” she smiles meekly. “It’s hard to get a date.” Her gaze returns to the mirror and with a tired smile she mumbles to herself; “Will this get any better?”

Little steps…

Cameron’s Coming Out

I suspect it might just be my overreactive demented imagination so I have kept this to myself, but for a while now, actually ever since I’ve first got this particular Ven, there’s just something really–hmmm “strange” isn’t quite the right word but okay maybe ‘peculiar’–about this doll and I suspect that ‘he’ isn’t quite happy being a male. I fully realise that hey fuck, this is all just plastic dolls we’re playing with, but I swear, whenever I see Cameron, he looks so uncomfortable in his own skin. Like he hates it. Like he knows it’s a beautiful and healthy body but it’s just not who ‘she’ is. Whew… It freaks me out a little, in the sense that, for the first time i saw and understood what this deep gender dysphoria may be like for some transwomen. It’s an unspeakable anguish when everyone around you insists that you ‘man’ up a little when really, you are just a girl and you want to be taken seriously as a girl. Not be made fun of because of your broad chest or adam’s apple. The pains it must be to try and hide all the masculine traits, just so society finds you more acceptable…ughh. Hmm… So now I’m not really sure what to do about Cameron ahaha, I like his/her character even though there’s nothing particularly interesting about them. I don’t want to just wipe his/her faceup and turn them into someone else, that would be wrong and offensive on so many levels. I’d love to help her become more female, but wow it’s hard as it is finding male clothes for the Ven, let alone female clothing, haaa and i can operate the sewing machine but heck if i know how to make decent outfits. It would be so awesome if i can mod this body and give her boobs, or better yet, buy one of Dollshe’s female bodies and transfer Cam’s head to it…. Hmm …

Edit: On second thought, i think the more important message is to love the body you’ve got, so i will keep her 5th Motif body and see if I could still make Cameron the woman she wants to be with no physical mods. Wooo!

Cameron’s Coming Out

Oh man……………

Heyaa!

Sorry it’s been a while since I’ve updated this blog 🙂 I’ve been busy with a few faceup commissions (if you wanna check out some of the stuff I’ve been doing then it’s here http://ruggedrealism.wordpress.com), but a couple of days ago I finally had a bit of time to repaint my Dollshe Saint, Malik.

I like his previous faceup, but it was just a bit too feminine, whereas Malik is a very blokey dude 😉 Previous faceup:

So yahh, I’ve made his eyebrows thicker and messed up his skin a bit so he looks rougher, ahah….

You know how some people have a ‘grail’ doll? Well, he ain’t it!! And thank goodness because otherwise I’d feel too hesitant to handle him. Malik and his mate, Jerrah, the Bernard (which I still need to repaint next) are my ‘play dolls’.

Oh man……………